E*trade ran a commercial several years back that struck me as pretty damn funny. It has become the stuff of television advertising legend.

Drug companies gained the right to broadcast TV ads for their drugs several years back, but one of the strictures placed on them was that they had to list the known side effects. E*trade played on this with great hilarity with a spoof commercial. At first, you think you're watching a commercial for Gene Enterprises's new anti-allergy drug, Nozulla. It shows a happy, beautiful woman dacing through fields full of allergens, unaffected by them since she is apparently taking Nozulla.

Then the narrator starts listing the side effects, and they get crazier and crazier. We cut to a surprised man working at his computer, the Nozulla ad playing on the TV behind him. Clearly he's been taking Nozulla, and he immediately jumps on E*trade and sells his stock in Gene Enterprises.

Click here to see the video! Below is a transcription of the text, since in my searches around the net, lots of people misquote it.

VOICEOVER: At Gene Enterprises, we've harnessed the power of the human gene so you can say good-bye to your allergies forever with new Nozulla. Nozulla may cause the following symptoms:

• Itchy rashes
• Full body hair loss
• Projectile vomiting
• Gigantic eyeball
• The condition known as "hot dog fingers"
• Children born with the head of a golden retriever
• Seeing the dead
• Bone liquefaction
• Possession by the Prince of Darkness
• Tail growth
• Elderly pregnancy...

TEXT: Learn to identify "trading opportunities."

NARRATOR: E*trade: it's your money.